I always struggled through life maintaining close friendships. For whatever reason, I was always the “back up friend.” I had a lot of friends who I considered to be sisters—my very best friends in the world. I confided in them, I trusted them, I always thought of them as my confidants. But, whatever the reason may be, I was always 4th, 5th, 6th on their list of friends. I was never anyone’s “best friend.” I was never the girl that someone would call and text first, the one who became someone’s family. I was always kind of on my own, doing my own thing, looking for a “girl gang” to call my own.
But, that all changed when I met my boyfriend.
We met randomly; at a bar when I least expected it. I was out with some co-workers and he was out with his friends and our eyes locked on opposite sides of the bar as if we were looking for each other the entire time. It sounded cliché—like a scene out of a movie. But, when we talked, it was if we had known each other all our lives. I always think, maybe we met in a past life. Maybe we were friends in another galaxy. Whatever the reason was—we clicked.
And, not just the “I’m into you” kind of click. No, it was different.
We didn’t immediately jump into a relationship. Instead, we took our time. We got to know each other. We stayed up until the sun came up talking about our deepest fears, our darkest desires, the things that f*cked us up so bad that we swore we’d never believe in happiness again. We listened to every genre of music, explored every intimate detail of our psyche, divulged down paths I had never let anyone else walk before.
We fell in love.
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But, it wasn’t something I had expected. In fact, it wasn’t something that I was out there looking for. It was different. I have been in love before. In fact, I had been in love before this, multiple times. But, I have never been in love like this. My boyfriend is my lover, he’s my supporter, and he’s my rock. But, he’s not just someone I come home to at night to sleep next to, he’s not just my date on a Friday night, he’s not just the person I am intimate with.
My boyfriend is my absolute best friend in the world and I’m not ashamed to admit that.
Time and time again I read headlines on websites targeted towards women suggesting that you need more in life than just to have a significant other; more than just a spouse or partner to fulfill you. And, I agree. Your boyfriend should not be the only person in your life that fulfills you. But, telling women that having your boyfriend be your “best friend,” and suggesting that you need a plethora of female friends in your life in order to thrive—they’re wrong.
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Sure, I have women friends—tons of them. But, none of those girls is my best friend. In fact, none of them come close.
My boyfriend makes me laugh, more than I have ever laughed before. He makes me love my quirks. He makes me appreciate my flaws. He finds my deepest worries and he soothes them effortlessly. On my darkest days, he is there for me with open arms. In my brightest moments, he basks in the sunshine as a true partner should. He always talks to me with respect and kindness, and even at our worst moments, he knows exactly how to communicate with me.
He shows me that life doesn’t always have to be a race, there are moments of beauty to stop and enjoy. He inspires me every single day—in and out—with all of the passion and ambition he inhabits. He makes me feel like anything in life is possible—that anything I dream of in life is possible.
He makes me a better me.
At the end of the day, a friendship—a true friendship—should be about love, appreciation, respect, and honesty. Thus far in my life, I have never met another living, breathing soul that shows these more than him. So, sure, I have girlfriends. I have female friends I’ll grab a drink with. Some I’ll sit down and have dinner with. I have some who I’d even go on a weekend getaway with. But, at the end of the day, no one comes close to my boyfriend, and I’ll never be ashamed to celebrate that.