We’re just going to dedicate and or direct this to all the douchebags out there. The guys that are really good at playing the nice guy card and fooling girls into thinking they’ve found a diamond in the rough. When really it just turns out you’re fantastic at pretending. You’re really just a douche.
I’m going to mark this one down as another lesson learned.
You opened up and let me in, briefly, and I trusted you.
I share things with you I didn’t share with many people because I thought you were different. Ha, I guess the real joke was and is on me. You wanted me when it was convenient for you, which is a dickish move.
I thought maybe things could change, we could do it your way for a while and something would click inside that skull of yours.
I believed that somewhere inside of you hiding was this romantic version of you that would come out and re-sweep me off my feet. That would stop feeding me these “I’m better off single” lines or “I can’t give you what you want” crap.
I made countless excuses for you and your behavior towards me to my friends.
They told me what you were doing wasn’t fair to me and that I should tell you to screw off, to stop toying with my emotions. They could see that I deserve better.
You know what? They’re absolutely 100% correct.
You let me feel bad for caring. Who does that? I apologized for worrying about you. You made me feel bad about sharing my emotions with you. I felt needy and burdensome. I allowed you to made me think I wasn’t going to be anything more than a girl you just sleep with and leave the next day.
However, the only person I should really be apologizing to is myself. I should apologize to my heart for letting it get pulled through the ringer again, for letting it go on for so long and for allowing me to think that there was something wrong with me. It made me feel undesirable and unlovable.
I’d tell my friends they’re right and I’m sorry I didn’t listen to them sooner because I know they were just trying to save me some tears and heartbreak.
I don’t regret you. We had some great times together.
I, however, know that I’m coming out on top in this situation, so the jokes on you. I’m a stronger woman for what has transpired between us.
There’s this moment that kind of clicks when you realize you’re not crazy or in the wrong for wanting more from the person whom you’re romantically involved with.
It may have taken me longer to get there but it’s okay cause I’m there now.
You see, I can look at my reflection in the mirror and I see a beautiful, intelligent, funny, sarcastic, kick-ass woman who is going to do great things. More importantly, I see a girl who doesn’t need you. I wonder what you see when you look at yourself in the mirror. I’m pretty sure you’re so far into the charades that the real you is lost.
The difference now is that I see through all that bs and I’m no longer fooled.
There may be a time when you’ll miss me, some sort of light bulb will click but don’t worry I’ll be okay. I learned from the best on how to focus on what’s best for you. So that’s exactly what I’m going to do.
So thanks for the tips.
The girl who sees right through you and is no longer impressed.
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